I have drastically cut down on my message board activity becuase I just don't feel welcome and I end up being upset more times than I feel happy. I just need to find that place where I am accepted 100%, other than in my morning daily chats. I need to find a place that inspires me to better and not make me feel unworthy. I'm not sure if a place like that exists on the internet and I'm ok if I don't find one. I really need to spend less time online anyway.
I've realized I need to become more me and less like other people. For a long time I wanted to be this person or that person but I think I'm much happier if I'm just me. Because I need to be accepted as just me.
As far as scrapbooking goes, I wish I could go back 3 years to when I didn't feel like I needed to scrap a certain way or use certain products. When I was happy with the paper at JoAnn's and Michael's. I need to stop feeling like I need to be published. I scrapbook for myself and my family. My parents love the album I made for them 5 years ago because it's all about the memories not techniques and products.
My struggle with shopping has been documented on the internet before. I like to shop but sometimes I shop too much for things I don't really need. I have come a long way in a year. Last year at this time I was in major credit card debit, well ok not major but major to me. I had no savings and each pay check was being eaten up by bills. Throughout the past year I've come up with a plan that works for me. I have saved money and plan on starting to really invest in the New Year but I want to save more money. I don't want a good portion of my pay check to go to credit cards.
One of my goals for Christmas break is to totally clean and purge my room. I want to go through everything and really think about if I need it and will I use it. I have piles upon piles in my room, most of the stuff I don't need. There are people out there that need things and I plan to donate. I also want to find a better way to organize my room. If I could convince my parents I might even rearrange my room since it's been the same for 14years. Although I don't think that will fly. I'd just be content with less clutter and couple new things like a new TV stand since the one I have is falling apart and is close to 20 years old. It's one of those cheap one's from a place like Target that probably cost $10.
I want to start the New Year fresh. I want to become the person I'm supposed to be because I don't think I'm there yet. I want to enjoy life more and appreciate the little things.
And since I've bored you with my ramblings here's a picture that makes me smile because I do enjoy tormenting my dog since she does such a good job tormenting me at times.